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Utopia Talk / General Talk / LOL Addiction 9: Police Standoff Phase
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Mar 07 17:07:01
"By The Time Bryce Harper's 13-Year Contract Expires, Hank [the host of "The Morning Sweat"] Will Be A Lonely, Old, Useless Relic"
[Onion Video: "The Morning Sweat"]
http://spo...ontract-expires-han-1833135945
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Mar 07 18:43:45
This particular mobile phone theft made me lol, so :D
http://imgur.com/gallery/L8SDqFA
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Mar 07 19:01:48
"Officer, where[abouts] is the closest bank?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lBiA-_BQ688
swordtail
Anarchist Prime
Fri Mar 08 14:05:23
'Get out of the car!' Cops release dramatic officer-involved shooting video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PY611ekXuXw
Cherub Cow
Member
Tue Apr 09 02:17:49
Trying to get a big pan through a regular-sized door:
http://imgur.com/gallery/jLX86mc
swordtail
Anarchist Prime
Wed Apr 10 11:18:09
http://twitter.com/AngryManTV/status/1114259441384398853
Cherub Cow
Member
Wed Apr 10 11:52:45
I know it’s a display model, but what kind of person just sticks an ungloved finger in there? D:
Cherub Cow
Member
Sun Apr 21 19:27:55
"Katrate"
(turn sound on)
http://imgur.com/gallery/tptpKiF
swordtail
Anarchist Prime
Mon Apr 22 17:38:55
AS-02 Various Administrative Wizardry Positions - INVENTORY

http://emp...licant/page1800?poster=1279695
Cherub Cow
Member
Wed May 01 01:00:53
That link didn't work for me, btw.

..
"Walgreens Unveils New Line Of Shrink-Wrapped Sandwiches To Grab When Something Has Gone Horribly, Horribly Wrong"
[Onion: News in Brief]
http://www...-wrapped-sandwiches-1834425941
"Whether you’re eating one on the go while heading to a miserable job, avoiding several outstanding warrants for failure to pay child support, or just don’t value yourself very highly, our sandwiches are slapped together in a way that’s guaranteed to make you wonder exactly why your body needs to continue on. Has everyone you once cared about now abandoned you? Are you down to your last $3 in loose change? Walgreens now has the perfect egg salad sandwich or plain hot dog to accompany speculation at exactly how low rock bottom can go. And if you’re at the end of the line, but you’re still not sure you want to step over it, why not think that over while forcing down a crumbling meatball sub from the room-temperature cooler we put across from the generic cough medicine and foot powder? Hell, grab a nice warm yogurt, too. You’re worth it."
tumbleweed
the wanderer
Mon May 20 00:50:07
SNL Weekend Update did the thing again where they write jokes for each other & don't see them until air time (supposedly)
(starts ~1:10)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yp81l2aVap4
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon May 20 00:54:04
lol XD ... that was a really good one :D

"Cat fight"
"That scene from Game of Thrones."
http://imgur.com/gallery/qIreF4q
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Jun 10 03:33:11
A fun concept, and then the ending has the lol :D

"How To Experience Chicago Like A Local By Settling Down, Starting A Family, And Living There"
"On this episode of Are We Blair Yet?, Onion Travel vlogger Blair Ryleigh explores all the safe parts of Chicago and experiences the city like a true local by settling down, starting a family, and living there for nine years."
[Onion Video]
http://www...al-by-settling-down-1835336019
Daemon
Member
Thu Jun 20 09:07:17
How to reset a "smart" light bulb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1BB6wj6RyKo

tumbleweed
the wanderer
Thu Jun 20 11:48:54
some good Bill Hader, especially the 2nd half anecdote

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DuQHCGa732U
Cherub Cow
Member
Fri Jun 21 18:15:20
That was good :D
Next time they'll have to stab him for real >:|
;p

..
lol, Daemon... I had to scrub through the video so it wouldn't waste my time ;D
...wait... that's GE's actual YouTube — not a satire page? D: D: D:
...and CNet defended it?? D: D: D:
lol, our planet is doomed...

..
This starts weird but improves :D
(weirdo anime cosplayer video edit)
http://imgur.com/gallery/aXJToLE
Cherub Cow
Member
Wed Jun 26 02:17:57
Another "Are We Blair Yet?" — Onion is making it happen with this one :D

"How To Find The Best Cheap Eats In The Dumpsters Behind Los Angeles's Best Restaurants"
[Onion Video, 1:33]
http://www...he-dumpsters-behind-1835737802
Cherub Cow
Member
Sat Jul 06 18:44:29
<3 kitty cats
http://imgur.com/gallery/MOK2K2j
..wait, wut? D:
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Jul 25 02:35:34
Another How to Basic appearance :D
(From 3 years ago)
"How To Tame a Wild Animal"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CWZZZ0-3UU
tumbleweed
the wanderer
Thu Jul 25 12:12:08
he's good at the uncomfortably high exposed thigh shots :p
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Jul 25 13:05:03
Must be wearing tighties to keep things off screen ;D
Cherub Cow
Member
Sun Oct 13 23:47:27
Good moment from "Cops" episode:
http://imgur.com/gallery/0JTfu5I
tumbleweed
the wanderer
Mon Oct 14 00:11:11
i have a feeling her child sells crack
Cherub Cow
Member
Tue Oct 15 02:57:34
Yeah, not sure I believe the prostitute's belief in her child here. :D
Or maybe she *doesn't* sell crack, but when someone showed up with $20 she was like, "Hmm... I could put plaster in a bag and get that $20..."

..
"Scared [Shitless] Fitness"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tek0YZE8Gos
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Dec 12 05:48:33
This one caught me off guard :D
(doggy and stairs)
http://i.imgur.com/Bu2EJSf.mp4
tumbleweed
the wanderer
Thu Dec 12 12:52:02
you have to wonder what he was trying to do... & hopefully he stops trying :p
tumbleweed
the wanderer
Thu Dec 12 12:57:35
random amusing thing from Twitter:

"Mr. Hook" is Culver City attorney Christopher Hook who is demanding payment by Allstate insurance for his clients, and this is Allstate complaining about his tactics in this page from a court filing:

http://pbs.twimg.com/media/ELDLBwDXkAAkFvB?format=jpg
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Dec 12 16:14:36
lol
Calling people "borderline retarded ... faggot ... gay boys" is "discriminatory" in Allstate's opinion? :(
Where my country done gone? ;D
tumbleweed
the wanderer
Sun Dec 22 20:25:26
another SNL joke swap
(joke swap starts about 1 minute in, but there's also a good opossum joke before that)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ys786ZsA5tI
Cherub Cow
Member
Sun Dec 22 23:50:31
lol. They could have substituted "Spirit" with "Frontier" Airline and it would have worked still :D ... probably a lot of discount airlines, actually..

The cue cards one was good :D
Really pushed him to the limits there ;p
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Dec 23 04:40:11
An accident in the cat world:
http://imgur.com/gallery/VGlRgtn
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Dec 26 03:51:36
"The Actress - SNL"
(A good one from April, 2019!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9HVH_I04ZrM
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Jan 02 03:15:17
Stray cats meow for food:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9EYZnSXEla0

I couldn't stop laughing at the way the food was dropped and they all go quiet to eat :D
Cherub Cow
Member
Tue Jan 07 07:16:11
"Holiday Baking Championship - SNL"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tebBj42fC3k
Cherub Cow
Member
Tue Jan 21 02:20:38
"Snuggles 666"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W8E3Umb__q0
Cherub Cow
Member
Sat Mar 28 21:59:07
Another SNL commercial I missed :D

Aron's List - SNL (2017)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNmrR8SQ5Z0
Cherub Cow
Member
Sun May 03 20:27:06
Eric Andre - Pizza Safety
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NcZfI6kJiPs
tumbleweed
the wanderer
Wed Jul 15 12:03:18
Disney World reopening ad (refiled from other thread :p)

http://twitter.com/madrid_mike/status/1282351918619086848
Cherub Cow
Member
Sun Jul 26 21:33:00
"Oh look! A dandelion!"
http://imgur.com/gallery/znerF5A
Cherub Cow
Member
Fri Jul 31 06:40:33
Gordon Ramsay with How2Basic-looking hands edited in:
http://i.imgur.com/8QTknuX.mp4
swordtail
Anarchist Prime
Sat Aug 01 10:10:13
Meet the guy who makes the racist statues

http://twitter.com/chaser/status/1276031022711189504
Cherub Cow
Member
Sun Aug 02 05:19:49
lulz.. a commission is a commission ;D
Cherub Cow
Member
Sun Aug 02 20:25:25
Just found out about this guy. Ryan Long comedy does political stuff in a sort of South Park way, where they make fun of ultra-partisans:
"When Wokes and Racists Actually Agree on Everything"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ev373c7wSRg
Cherub Cow
Member
Sun Aug 02 21:51:01
Sounds like he's self-consciously channeling South Park humor. This is a long video (so don't bother), but around 19:40 he mentions that woke culture has stifled comedic voices, so people have started doing what South Park did at its launch (low budget but whatever they wanted) and the industry had to move to *them*, which is a good message for comedians. I.e., do your comedy outside the social media outrage circles and just build an audience.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MiuFgSFElg
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Aug 03 20:48:21
I'll try not to spam Ryan Long videos, but this one was funny:

"How to Sell Protest Footage to FOX AND CNN"
[Ryan Long; June 15th, 2020]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xiYZ__Ww02c
Cherub Cow
Member
Sun Aug 09 22:27:12
Eric Andre - Team Go!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFNOgw01_lc
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Aug 31 05:18:59
"WATCH: Burrito Unboxing"
[Onion/Clickhole; Augsust 26, 2015]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jXvVhX2gZQE
Cherub Cow
Member
Fri Sep 25 03:49:09
"People Talk About The Moment That Made Them Believe In God"
[Onion/Clickhole; September 26, 2017]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BmfPFxFYGJs
Cherub Cow
Member
Fri Oct 16 06:48:33
"Old Man Says WNBA Players Need Husbands"
[Ryan Long; October 14th, 2020]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TU6itl6ck_Q
He's *so* good at getting people off track with absurd scenarios :D
Cherub Cow
Member
Tue Oct 27 02:44:21
"Judy Greer Interview (Part 2) | The Eric Andre Show"
[Adult Swim; October 26th, 2020]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gDcVgak6vxA
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Nov 02 07:06:01
The ending of this may be the most bazaar thing that's happened this season of Eric Andre :D

The Eric Andre Show - Tyler Henry Interview (S05E03)
[Niconeve; November 2nd, 2020]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DlVebyMmKxU
tumbleweed
the wanderer
Mon Nov 02 17:17:56
^the video has been terminated
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Nov 02 18:12:04
Arg! I knew it wouldn't last long. It was a straight rip of the show posted by a show-unaffiliated YouTuber. He had been posting a lot of them without getting flagged, so I was hoping he'd get away with it for a little longer ;p

Here's the relevant part, but keep in mind that a lot of random weird stuff happened before this :D
http://i.imgur.com/FajTfhq.mp4
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Nov 02 20:23:49
Oh, Adult Swim wised up and monetized the whole interview on their channel :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QEIYoRKE3jo
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Nov 05 07:05:34
"Flash knocks out Peter Parker"
[Tobey in the MCU; January 18th, 2020]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cD0fdVnKwmM
Cherub Cow
Member
Fri Nov 06 01:24:07
This will probably be taken down from YouTube soon, but for a limited time!
Dermot Mulroney on Eric Andre (S05E04)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6P9KoYweGc
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Nov 12 23:24:09
"Interview with a Nazi (Big Questions)"
[Ryan Long; November 22nd, 2019]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pF1j4_cEt8s
Cherub Cow
Member
Wed Nov 25 05:40:33
I was cry-laughing while watching this :D

Eric Andre - Chad Johnson (Full Interview)
[Adult Swim; November 24th, 2020]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAYlzNyLQ0k
Cherub Cow
Member
Wed Nov 25 05:55:47
A good post-Church palate cleanser, if you believe the comments ;D

Eric Andre - The Pageant
[Adult Swim; November 23rd, 2020]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0s7ZOfufLhs
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Jan 11 09:59:48
This one hurt a little too right ;)

"Radical Right vs Radical Left"
[Ryan Long; January 11th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8j7VPct-FWw
"Truth be told, we both actually made support for our movement go down."
tumbleweed
the wanderer
Tue Jan 12 12:58:03
just got around to watching the Chad Johnson interview up there & i endorse as well :p

so many guests look legitimately concerned & i don't blame 'em :p
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Feb 15 08:59:45
"How To Remove a Security Tag"
[HowToBasic; February 1st, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NJjGx93ZPtU
Cherub Cow
Member
Wed Feb 17 21:38:27
Ryan's smirk at the end of this was great :D

"I Cancelled my Dad"
[Ryan Long; February 17th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0YEub7dtX0
Cherub Cow
Member
Sat Mar 13 06:47:20
I've seen this guy a lot in an "Inside Amy Schumer" video I send out a lot*, but I didn't realize how funny he was on his own. In addition to this, he does a lot of impression videos where he edits celebrities faces onto his own:

"Dead Eye DIY Episode 2"
[KyleDunnigan; March 12th, 2020]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2276xcz9kYg

*The Schumer sketch I use for comments sometimes :p
http://i.imgur.com/8pKArBB.mp4
Repel
Member
Wed Apr 21 07:59:33
http://www...are&utm_medium=web2x&context=3
tumbleweed
the wanderer
Sat Apr 24 18:54:14
bitter IKEA employee addressing customer comments
http://twitter.com/AnandWrites/status/1384958401151655939
AnimalActivist
Member
Wed Apr 28 04:52:03
This is just terrible.
http://twitter.com/_evelynrae/status/1385895612478943232
Allahuakbar
Member
Sat May 08 14:01:06
We can be funny, too:
http://pbs...X0AUcLsH?format=jpg&name=small
Allahuakbar
Member
Thu May 13 08:03:12
http://adv...reat-deceiver-is-water-alcohol
Nimatzo
iChihuaha
Mon May 17 14:42:26
Cherub Cow
Member Tue Apr 09 02:17:49
Trying to get a big pan through a regular-sized door:

http://imgur.com/gallery/jLX86mc

I have watched this 50 times, it still makes laugh until I cry. So many things are going on here, the best part is when everyone goes silent and they are shaking what is left in the pan. What are they thinking?
nhill
Member
Mon May 17 15:34:01
Oh man, that's good. My favorite part is the guy thinking his dog food bowl will catch all the food and it isn't even tilted to his side...

http://www...oads/2021/05/xhb6ikk4lby61.png

I need to try these new drive through walmarts
Cherub Cow
Member
Sat Jun 26 10:11:47
An especially funny Viva La Dirt League skit:
"When a death knight does side quests - Death Knight"
[June 23rd, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_tLV7lVJ9c
Repel
Member
Sat Jun 26 10:17:09
hahaha I saw that one passing in Discord, its a very good one
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Jul 15 05:20:07
Long really pushed a joke to excellence in this one XD

"What's the Craziest Race of Girl to Date?"
[Ryan Long; July 14th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XRFl3amX9Sw
Cherub Cow
Member
Sat Jul 31 09:27:33
Another good Viva La Dirt League! \:D/
"Awkward celebrations in a restaurant - Happy Birthday"
[July 30th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzPz2cnAPzo
It takes a dark/horror turn, I love it :D

Interestingly.. Sartre uses the case of a waiter to describe an example of existentialist "bad faith".. where people pretend to lack the ability to choose in order to fulfill defined roles (like the waiter who must conform to a particular act in order to behave in the context of a restaurant).. so.. the extreme terror that everyone feels in this Viva skit is everyone being aware that they have the choice and freedom to not participate in a role (waiter, bystander, birthday celebrator) while simultaneously feeling trapped as objects of social convention — conscious of their own self-imprisonment but terrified of the cost of freeing themselves \:D/
Repel
Member
Sat Jul 31 10:18:31
lol I love that one!

they have so many good ones
Cherub Cow
Member
Sat Sep 04 07:06:09
"How the main character "develops" in 90% of shows."
[CalebCity; August 29th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ofu0I4jshY4
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Sep 06 03:49:22
This is political, but it's a funny montage edit of Australian NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian saying what Australians hear when she speaks. It's sort of like that edit of the presidents from "Die Hard 4.0"/"Live Free or Die Hard" (2007)
"Gladys Berejiklian Takes Over The World"
[Remix Matrix; August 30th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLTGXblgUoc
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Sep 06 07:53:31
I swear I'm not posting *every* Viva La Dirt League video :p

"Pretending to be a smoker - Smoke Break"
[September 6th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZ9ascT2Rng

The stare at the end is intense :D
Repel
Member
Thu Sep 23 09:01:15
https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/ptlhb8/got_him/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

your first time? ^^
Repel
Member
Thu Sep 23 09:01:45
http://www...are&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

here now you can click it as well
Cherub Cow
Member
Sat Sep 25 21:57:15
That went around Imgur around the same time... very strange that someone posted an old interview of Natasha Lyonne and that it got that much traction. Marketing tactic?
That was from 2000, which was around when she did "The Slums of Beverly Hills" (1998), which has some of my go-to references ;D

..
This sums up most of the current tribal issues:
"Vaccine mandates in a year from now"
[tyler fischer; September 3rd, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJGZp54h1uI&list=LL
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Sep 27 01:36:19
Millions experience this every day :'(

"When you find someone who had the same problem as you"
[Joel Haver; September 22nd, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnUpTyKSjag
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Oct 04 19:06:26
Viva La Dirt League again :p

"Fear of being a fraud - Imposter Syndrome"
[October 4th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RMGd3aoenn4
Cherub Cow
Member
Sun Oct 10 21:03:39
"Star Boat "The Space Blob" - Part 2"
[KyleDunnigan; September 30th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkcCeVo5K5s
Cherub Cow
Member
Sun Oct 10 21:12:03
"Pu$$ies New Children's Book for Adults!"
[KyleDunnigan; September 28th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VCS950SM5w0
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Oct 11 19:29:11
This is becoming the Viva la Dirt League appreciation thread ;)

"Completing a horrifying quest - Puppies"
[October 11th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EMk__UkbzSA
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Oct 21 06:20:17
"STAR BOAT - Part 3. The Thrilling conclusion."
[KyleDunnigan; October 19th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CzJoNVIX92Q
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Nov 01 21:17:18
"Checkout operator choice"
[Viva La Dirt League; November 1st, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gN3A6CwfyBs
Repel
Member
Thu Dec 16 08:40:50
http://imgur.com/gallery/ieGgRuV
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Dec 20 05:15:12
poor doggo ;p

..
"Believing in the Tooth Fairy"
[Viva La Dirt League; December 20th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DEOVmslVaSc
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Dec 20 10:53:28
Good question cards for a nice and apolitical Christmas party ;)
"How To Ruin Your Family Gatherings"
[Ryan Long; December 20th, 2021]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kj0VvEdt_wk
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Dec 27 05:25:38
Very funny VLDL from today:
"Social media jealousy"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3IblxUAbyoM

It was also an opportunity for me to comment that social media sites that use a capital "K" instead of a lowercase "k" for follower count have been accidentally saying, "Kelvin" (K), rather than, "kilo" (k) :p
Cherub Cow
Member
Sat Feb 12 04:52:29
Probably the funniest thing I've seen in a few weeks :D

"The Woke Vegan Feminist Debate"
[Podcast of the Lotus Eaters; February 11th, 2022]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epaTaKyOQ-o
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Apr 21 05:58:43
Psaki gets emotional because her leftist pedo friends hit a road block in their plans to indoctrinate children ;D
http://twitter.com/i/status/1516827287844446210
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Apr 21 06:02:35
Alex Martens' Steven Segal biopic continues:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JlEsEyii550
Cherub Cow
Member
Thu Apr 21 16:14:47
Lulz. Ken Jeong walks off the Masked Singer after one of NYC's greatest mayors, who recently exposed election fraud and Hunter Biden's crack and prostitute habit and role in illegally funneling money to Joe Biden, turns out to be the masked singer:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qy_R2R_tetw
Amazing salt flow on this one. :D
Cherub Cow
Member
Tue May 31 07:28:04
"Nathan For You: Asian Accent, Valet Issue"
(From a December 2015 episode)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wKUneur1RDE
Cherub Cow
Member
Sat Sep 10 03:08:54
Jon Stewart gave a medal to a Nazi, sure sure, but it's an honest mistake!
"Jon Stewart needs your support..."
[Kyle Dunnigan; September 8th, 2022]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tTCIMnNSy0
Cherub Cow
Member
Mon Sep 19 19:11:57
Eli is back!! ;D

"Eli Manning goes undercover as a College Football walk-on | Eli’s Places"
[ESPN; September 19th, 2022]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Na2hOcx4uX8
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